Birthday Woes

At the end of this month, Tallen will turn six years old. Average kids tend to get excited about birthdays. Tallen has never been like that. His first couple of birthdays, there was really no reaction to the party, cake, or gifts, whatsoever. By his third birthday, he went into a screaming fit, hands clamped over his ears, when everyone began singing Happy Birthday. He would do this at other peoples' birthday parties as well. Of course, so many people singing the song at once was an assault on his sensitive ears. So, we stopped singing it on his birthday and quietly "whisper sing" it, behind Tallen's back, to other family members on their birthdays.

On his fourth birthday, I had Tallen dressed up so handsomely in a new outfit. Ten minutes into the party, he had already stripped down to his underwear LOL He absolutely hated wearing clothes back then. All the guests were aware of Tallen's Asperger's and just laughed off their initial shock and the party went wonderfully. Later that night however, I awoke to Tallen screaming, "Fire, Mama! Fire!". I stumbled through the house, absolutely terrified! When I found Tallen, he was sitting in the floor, playing with a new truck he had received for his birthday, pointing to the flame decals on the side and screaming , "Fire!" LOL I must have nine lives, as he has given me many scares like this.

His fifth birthday went off without a hitch. We had a shrimp dinner (his favorite) and cake and ice cream, and nobody sang "the song".

This year, I can feel trouble brewing. A couple of months ago, Tallen's older sister reminded him that he would soon be six years old and would then be a big boy. He ran from the room crying and was out of sorts for many hours after. He finally said, " I don't want to be six years old! Then I'll be a big boy forever!" He is very sensitive about being called anything but a boy. He doesn't want to be a big boy. He even refuses to wear the Super Man PJs that his aunt gave him. When I asked him why, he said, "Because I am NOT a man. LOL Whenever I ask what sort of cake he might want for his party or similar questions, he falls silent and walks out of the room. I feel so sad for him, that he is so troubled. I am even wondering if, to spare him the trauma, maybe we should just not even make a big deal out of his birthday. Then I have visions of his calling me out on Dr. Phil, twenty years from now, because I didn't celebrate his sixth birthday. LOL